Archive for August, 2007

Be the Change

Sunday, August 12th, 2007

The more I think about this negative world, the more I create negativity. The more I am open to the possibility of good and love, the more of it I see. The closer I get to a purpose for my life, a strong ideal, the more empowered I become. The further I try and live a fulfilling life, one that I can look back on and feel I contributed a large amount, the more at peace I become. The longer I procrastinate on all of this, the further away I push my peace away. The longer I use feeble excuses to mitigate what I should be doing, the less time I have to complete my goals. And if I do not contribute my life to serving the greater good, the lofty ideal in my heart, I have wasted my life.

Ghandi said, “You must be the change you want to see in the world.” I completely agree with that. If you want people to change, wouldn’t it make sense that you have to make those same changes first? You have to lead by example. You cannot claim to be an activist for the environment while buying things that pollute the environment. You should not preach something you do not practice yourself. That just leads to incongruencies. It’s like me preaching the benefits of the Atkins diet, even though I have never experienced it myself. Even if I know all about the diet, I still have not experienced it. Viewing something fromt he outside is totally different from experiencing something from the inside.

There are definitely things in this world that need to change. I am sure most people can list at least ten things they would like to change in this world. But just talking about it doesn’t change the situation. For example, let’s say you are a wage slave at a job you hate and you complain about your job to your friends, your family, your co-workers, and everyone under the sun. That just adds to the negativity you are already feeling and offers no solution. Now let’s say you quit that job to pursue more meaningful work. You stopped worrying so much about playing it safe and decided to go all or nothing towards a purpose you have in mind for your life. And even though you may fail initially, even the failure is more rewarding than the highest success at that previous job. And even though you haven’t got it figured out yet, you enjoy the path you are on and embrace all of its twists and turns.

If you die with your music still in you, your life will most likelly be filled with regret. Think of how many people could have benefitted from your hypothetical life of service. But because you chose to take the road everyone else takes, without any real meaning except meeting your physical needs, you stagnate at a certain mental level, a certain level of consciousness, and you remeain there for the rest of your life. It is a choice to grow. It is a choice to pursue a higher purpose. It is also a choice to sit back and do nothing. But in every choice you make, you are the one who is responsible. Stop playing the victim. Start imagining possibilities. Do some soul searching. Stop watching television. Find your passion. Empower yourself. Deprogram your social considioning. It’s all here in this pamphlet.

Make changes that will not just benefit you, but the world as well. If we leave one thing after we die, wouldn’t it be nice to have a net positive effect on the planet? If you add up all your positive actions and subtract the negative ones, you would most likely want your actions towards the greater good outmatch the evil or inconsequential acts, wouldn’t you? You should strive to be someone who embraces abundance and has no problem being generous. It is a complete shift in mindset that will cultivate these changes. It is a complete shift in actions that will supplement these changes.

You can be the change in the world. Even if you think what you do doesn’t matter on a large scale (like reducing your ecological footprint), still do it anyway. Your model may inspire others to do so and that could lead to a revolution. It will be like a positive spiral upward. When people see your passion, your energy, your resilience, and your guts, they will wonder where you got all of this from. And when they are truly ready to listen, you can tell them how to lead richer, more fulfilling lives. You can be the navigator. You can give your vast experience to others. You can be the model for service to the highest good of all. Or you can stay at that dead-end job. You can work like a dog your whole life at a job you hate and die unhappy. It is up to you. Both paths are neither right nor wrong. It’s just one is more empowering than the other. Your choice.

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Naturalistic Rant

Tuesday, August 7th, 2007

This is something I composed while sitting in my backyard outside in 100 degree heat (in the shade). I was in a very natural kind of mood, so here is the excerpt from my rant:

There are millions/billions of things going on in a small patch of grass, but we are so concerned with ourselves we never take the time to explore. I feel more at peace when I am away from physical, man-made constructs. In a way, I feel home. Pulling weeds is insane. Weeds are one of the most adaptive plants out there, as it can grow with hardly any nourishment. Why is it we are compelled to destroy that which we believe is undesirable? Without human beings, the world would be covered in these “weeds,” as we call them. I don’t even think the weeds know they are undesirable. So they are most likely shocked when we pull them, a sort of, “Who the hell do you think you are, taking my life with absolutely no justification for doing so, other than the fact you do not find me ascetically pleasing?” Imagine if we did that with our children. All ugly children get killed and are thrown away. And who are we as a species to make the judgment as to what stays and what goes? Who the hell do we think we are?

I am so sick of the constant “sounds of society.” The air conditioner humming, the car engine guzzling, the artificial radiative background noise of the television, talking about whether or not some athlete broke some record. THE RING OF THE BLASTED TELEPHONE. I guess we feel if we distract ourselves enough from the things we’ve done, we will never have to face all these crimes against nature. And I know most of us mean well. We really do. But we’re so caught up in the culture with its incessant distractions and obligations. And it is almost impossible for us to break out of it.

I am glad I have at least some nature to look upon. We have some trees in the backyard, and just being there trying to listen over the car noises that dissipate the “natural effect,” it does something for me. You can never really “listen” anymore because of all this man-made noise. I just want to be one with the world, one with nature, but all this extra distraction-based ingenuity makes it so difficult. It’s over 100 degrees outside as I sit and write in the shade. I am but a few feet from my air conditioned house, my Internet connection, and the so-called security we all long for. But now all I feel I need to do is sit here for awhile and collect the rest of my thoughts.

P.S. I probably lost six pounds in water weight just sitting here. I think right now the goal is to get one of those PARABOLIC sweat stains on my shirt. Wish me luck.

P.P.S. I am probably going to freeze to death when I go back into the AC-heavy house.

P.P.P.S. Writing on paper takes up way more space than typing on the computer. These paragraphs looked much bulkier outside. I’d blame the heat exhaustion.

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What’s New

Saturday, August 4th, 2007

I am currently working on a set list for Monday and Tuesday as I will be performing at the Comedy Cabana on those two days. I feel pretty good about it, and I have a feeling my set will be dynamite. I usually do well at comedy club settings, but in other, non-comedy settings such as coffee houses and generic open mics, I often fail to capture the mood of the crowd, as they are more musical and poetry-reading oriented. Some people like to do that sort of thing and I’m fine with it. It’s just I feel like they have all this music and then, “Oh, by the way, we have a comedian.”

It is probably good experience anyway because I will encounter resistant crowds in the future, no doubt, and I will have to figure out a way to deal with them. But I am not so bad at thinking on my toes. When I was up in Rhode Island, I did a couple coffee shops and ended up totally scrapping my planned material and just commented on the room and talked about how the jokes I tried did not work. I got some gigantic laughs. I’ve been studying comedy for over five years now and what I’ve learned is that if you are not doing so well and do not acknowledge that, you will come off as ignorant. At least if you say something, as I did, “Someone better get over here and get me off this stage.” I kind of dragged out everything I did. Part of the problem was the house I was living in was not very conducive to coming up with a solid set that I could memorize. See the previous post for details. No central air, nowhere to really sit at a table to concentrate, constant distractions, and the heat was unbearable.

In order for me to concentrate fully, I need a quiet, calm, and comfortable atmosphere, like the one I harbor at home. And when I rehearse my act, I need to be alone. People always asking, “What are you doing? Why are you talking to yourself?” I need about a three-hour uninterrupted block of time to get into the “zone.” I could not do that in Rhode Island. The way my friend’s mind worked, we always had to be doing something external to my comedy. We had to go here to pick up this, we had to eat something, we had to pick up his drug-addicted girlfriend (which I will not comment on further). So it was no wonder I went onstage twice unprepared, not to mention that I was so exhausted because I could not get a deep sleep in such a humid environment. My condition calls for at least eight to ten hours of sleep for me to function normally, or at least close to normal. But if I were to tell him that, he’d look at me like I was from Mars.

It was the whole always having to be “on” that got to me. I need time to unwind and to get myself in a mental mood to do things, and there was just no time. I am not someone who can live life on the edge, completing millions of arduous and trivial tasks just for the sake of doing so. I carefully choose the actions I take in advance because I know what is important to me and what is simply not worth it. As a small example, I no longer go to movies much because most of them are severely disappointing. The only movies I will go see are the ones I am sure will be worth my time and money. When you are away from home, you end up doing things that you realize were not worth your time. I saw two movies I was utterly disappointed in and could have spent my time doing much more enlightening activities. For some reason, since I began this journey into self-exploration, entertainment does not do it for me anymore. Or maybe it is just the quality has dwindled so far down it’s just not worth it.

All I really know for sure is that I am ready to get on with my life. Overcoming obstacles is something I am now too familiar with and the only thing I can do now is take it easy. I need to work on comedy, work on getting my degree, and learn to embrace my life the way I was always meant to. It is a shame that some people will never break their mental model of reality to truly live the life of their dreams, but I know I am currently on that path, and the path is just as rewarding as the destination. Joy in the present trumps suspended joy in the future. That is all.

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